John Agliata – Johnny Boy Marketing

This is part of a series of self-discovery blogs inspired by The Good Trade’s “99 Exercises for Self-Discovery.”

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Today’s Assignment: Imagine a day in your life 10 years from today.

The Deets: This dreaming exercise was originally created by Milton Glaser (described by Debbie Millman here) where you set a timer for 30 minutes and let yourself dream in precise detail, going through your day from start to finish. Take time to describe the kind of home you wake up in. Is there someone with you? What’s the environment feel like? What do you do first? Do you have pets? If yes, what kind? Do you travel often? If so, where? How do you feel in your body? Once the timer is up, read what you dreamt up. You might be surprised by what you wrote!

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So this is 60, huh?

My feet hit the ground as Carla snores softly behind me in bed. I look down at my Apple Watch — 5:30 a.m., about what I would expect. I disconnect from my CPAP machine, thus becoming fully human once again and breathing on me own, something Darth Vader couldn’t manage. Remember him?

I take the familiar path out into the family room, though the family that fills the room these days has gotten smaller on a day-to-day basis. Joey and Div recently celebrated their 10th anniversary. It was great hanging out with them and their two kids, my grandkids! Who knew I’d learn how to braid hair!?!?

The coffee pot whirs as I unload the dishwasher. I reflect on how this used to be Jonah’s job, but now Jonah is 25, finishing his master’s degree in engineering while working for a design/construction firm. I wonder how serious he is about the woman he brought to the anniversary family party we had for his brother and sister-in-law. She seems like a great girl.

As I move back and forth through the recently remodeled kitchen, it’s nice not to hear the floor squeak. How did we put up with that damn squeak for so long? Financial necessity, I guess. It took a while for us to get back rolling with saving money, but with Jonah’s departure for college, Carla was able to start working full time, and my job at RGA has been great, as has my side business, Johnny Boy Marketing. It’s the side businesses that fills my soul, now that I’m doing just writing and not having to do website management and video stuff. It’s not that I can’t do that other stuff; it’s that writing is where it’s at for me.

As I finish emptying the dishwasher, Tank, our bulldog, makes an appearance. He always looks like I’m disturbing him so greatly by being up and alive at this hour, but truthfully, he looks the same way at noon, at 5 p.m., at midnight. That’s just Tank.

I let him outside and spend a few moments taking in the early not-quite-fall cool air of the morning. The sun is starting to brighten the sky, and it promises to be a warm one later.

With coffee in hand, I head into my office. I like getting some writing done before my day job starts. I’m working on my latest collection of short stories. No paying publisher cares to publish these missives, so I do it with the proceeds from Johnny Boy Marketing, and it feels good to have people read my stuff.

Soon, Carla awakens and begins her morning preparations. We’ve found a peace in the mornings after Jonah left. She is most definitely not a morning person, and I don’t hoist my morning chattiness on her. She gets ready, we say “good morning” followed shortly later by “goodbye,” and the house is now mine. Well, mine and Tank’s. Carla enjoys what she does as a personal assistant for a young man with developmental disabilities, and she’s good at it, too. Now that she’s full-time, she gets more deeply involved in her client’s lives, and she really makes a difference.

I sit down at my desk and think that I have to do something soon about this emerging gut. It’s not a new gut. It’s just a growing gut, and that annoys me. How did I get to be this old? This out of shape? I should have done something about this when I was younger, but there were too many aches and pains back then, though that belies the reality of how many aches and pains there are today.

There have been many times when I didn’t think I’d live even this long, and that would have been OK. At some point in the now-distant past, I would have thought the struggles of life would have eased up as the years progressed. But I gave up on that hope long ago. Life has been a struggle because that’s what my life has been. It’s like water being wet.

I type out my daily missive to the few people who care to read my drivel on the regular. Why I keep doing this is beyond me. I guess my thought is that, after I’m gone, someone who maybe would have cared more had they gotten to know me will read this and be able to know who I was. I had a lot to offer, and it seems like not many people ever really gave me a chance, never really chose to be in my life at anything but a superficial level.

It’s hard not to feel lonely sometimes. Still. So I pack up my work stuff and head to a coffee shop. Coffee is much better — and more affordable — since Starbucks’ collapse. Mom-and-pop coffee shops are the bomb, and I head to my favorite one to post up and get some work done. Climate change has drastically altered the life insurance industry, and I’m knee-deep in a project writing about that. Sometimes I wonder if those whole planet is just going to catch fire and spontaneously combust. I wouldn’t mind all that much.

Jonah texts, and it pops up on my heads-up display. He’s talking smack because his Orioles are running away with the American League East. They have been on a tear over the past three or four years. Great team.

I have meetings, write stuff, and eventually head back home. I start seasoning chicken and get rice going for when Carla returns from work. The grill lights up with the push of a button on my app, and the food is good.

It’s a typical evening for us. Carla is doing what she does — busy doing this and that — and I do what I do — watch sports, read, relax. We turn in around 10 p.m.