Hitler, Broken TVs and the DMV — Sept. 17, 2021

Me this morning, in GIF form:

Folks, I try. I really do. But I’m worn thin.

I got up and decided before starting a work-from-home day that I would attach the TV I just brought over from Old House to the new stand I bought. Easy-peasy. Hooked the wires up and turned it on.

And saw this:

Oh Hitler, you suck. BTW, this is a screen for a Netflix doc about tyrants that I haven’t watched yet. I’m thinking I’ll see my former boss from Minnesota on it.

Now, typically if you put Hitler on the screen next to anything, he’s going to win the “suckiest thing on the screen” award, hands down. But on this screen? That’s not a spider, though it scared the shit out of me before I realized it was my actual TV display showing that I didn’t treat it well enough when I moved it from Old House to New House.

Fine. The world’s an imperfect place. Screws fall out all the time. Bad things happen to TVs. Not a big deal.

Except it is a big deal to me in the moment because I’m sick of stuff breaking and things that should go smoothly not going smoothly.

Which makes what I did next absolutely stupid. I went to the DMV because, as detailed a few weeks ago, I’m driving on expired tags. My first attempt at getting all legal and stuff was met with a huge line that moved two inches in 20 minutes, and whatever the geometry or algebra or trigonometry that needed to be used to figure out how long it would be until it was my turn to talk to the one employee didn’t compute for my work-from-home schedule.

So I went the following Saturday. And it was closed. Because Labor Day was Monday.

Today’s attempt was met once again by a line out the door that moved two inches in 20 minutes, and sorry folks, but I got stuff to do. Then I noticed my “check tire pressure” light was on.

Seriously? We’re gonna do this? Today?

Went to the gas station. Filled up my tires. They’re fine. It’s just a chilly-ish morning, and “science.” Came back home. Tried to renew my plates online, which of course I can’t do because they didn’t send me a reminder notice to do so, a reminder notice that includes a PIN (not a PIN number) that is essential to the process. Ah-ha! But there’s a phone number to renew your plates! So I called it.

And got as far as giving my license plate number because the kind woman on the other end of Alexander Graham Bell’s torture device said, “And what company is that affiliated with?”

Now, I wish I had a company car. But I don’t. My car, which I’ve owned since 2018 following a particularly nasty car wreck that killed my previous vehicle, has never been affiliated with any company except John Agliata Inc. And that apparently was the wrong answer.

So Kind Woman informed me she was going to transfer me to their general help line so we could get “the situation” sorted out. That was a bridge too far for me today. I have never had a “situation” with this car that needed sorting out when I renewed my registration in the past, and I sure as hell wasn’t going to deal with one that somehow emerged today.

Thus, I remain an illegal in the eyes of the law.

Thank God Trump lost.


The ‘Don’t Blame Me, I Didn’t Say It’ of the Day

‘We know that more people die than would otherwise because of car accidents, but by and large, cars create way more value in the world than they destroy. And I think social media is similar.’

Adam Mosseri, instagram’s chief

Mosseri was defending his baby from a flurry of criticism based on documents that show Facebook knows Instagram is toxic for teens and does little to address it.

I’m puzzled by Mosseri’s analogy. Isn’t the auto industry heavily regulated, unlike social media? Maybe Mosseri wants the government to step in to help him do the right thing by the people he serves. Me thinks not.


Respect The List

Rolling Stone redid its list of the 500 best songs ever. The top 10?

10. Outkast ‘Hey Ya!’
9. Fleetwood Mac ‘Dreams’
8. Missy Elliott ‘Get Ur Freak On’
7. The Beatles ‘Strawberry Fields Forever’
6. Marvin Gaye ‘What’s Going On’
5. Nirvana ‘Smells Like Teen Spirit’
4. Bob Dylan “Like a Rolling Stone’
3. Sam Cooke ‘A Change is Gonna Come’
2. Public Enemy ‘Fight the Power’
1. Aretha Franklin ‘Respect’

I am shocked and outraged by the callous oversight of any of the fine works of Kip Winger.

Um, she was only seventeen.

Today’s Reasons to Keep Living

  1. The Core Four (Me, Wifey Poo and Boys The Elder and Younger) will be together this weekend.
  2. Fall starts next week. It’s my favorite season, and that has nothing to do with pumpkin spice.
  3. I’ve lost 25 pounds since I started eating clean. Gotta stick around to show off my beach (dad) bod next summer.

More From ‘A Puzzle Known As Life’

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Boy The Singer, Nov. 23, 2021

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Big Buck — Nov. 14, 2021

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Sloth Talk — Nov. 8, 2021

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Punk! — Nov. 5, 2021

🧩 Today’s Puzzle Pieces 🧩Wrasslin’ 🤼‍♂️Wifey Poo 🦶Costco 🛒 Boy The Younger and I found ourselves this evening in the most difficult-to-spell-without-looking-it-up building in the Midwest, Chaifetz Arena, home of the Midwest’s most-weirdly named college basketball team, the St. Louis University Billikens. But we weren’t there for hoops. We were there to watch the oddContinue reading “Punk! — Nov. 5, 2021”

Work Drinkin’ – Sept. 3, 2021

I’ll Drink to That Since my departure from newspapers in 2009, I’ve worked for very conservative not-for-profit organizations. An electric cooperative. A Lutheran benefits provider. A pediatric orthopedic hospital. None ever encouraged me to post photos on our social media of employees drinking during the workday. But that happened to me today following our champagne-tastingContinue reading “Work Drinkin’ – Sept. 3, 2021”

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